Avoiding the “Girlfriend 15” – So You’re Committed

The first thought that went through my mind when I woke up one morning as someone new’s girlfriend was, holy cr*p. I was thrilled, petrified, and everything in between. I had committed to someone who was more than I could wish for. But I had also been very hurt recently in the past.

The first time I was someone’s girlfriend was in preschool. But, I’m pretty sure I didn’t get asked a formal commitment question. The second time was in the sixth grade. His name was Matt and our friend groups had decided we were the perfect match. I think we may have said ten words to each other over the duration of our “relationship,” and over half of them were, “Will you be my girlfriend?” and my eager response of, “Yes.” When you’re 12, being someone’s girlfriend lasts about two weeks and is pretty much a formality for it to be okay to hold hands at recess. As an adult, the question becomes a lot more meaningful. It means you see a future with this person.

Whether it’s the first time or the tenth, being asked to be someone’s girlfriend is exhilarating. If you know me, you know I tend to lack a filter. So, it wouldn’t shock you to know that my latest relationship became exclusive when I asked, “Why haven’t you asked me to be your girlfriend yet?!” I had failed miserably at trying to play the field and go on other dates, our compatibility and chemistry were seemingly off the charts, and he had already told me he had cut off all other “prospects” after our first date. I also may or may not have had a couple of silver tequila and soda waters before I mustered up the courage to ask. His response, “You told me you wanted to continue being independent!” And, that was true too. However, we had established a relationship where I could have the best of both worlds because I had taken the steps in the “So You’re Dating” phase.

After you decide to be exclusive, it’s important to continue the balancing act both in and out of the relationship. These are four ways to ensure your healthy habits stick once you got his commitment.

1. It’s okay to say no.

Remember that “me” time we talked about last week? For better or worse, it can easily become a rarity when you’re in a committed relationship and want to spend time with each other. However, if you need some alone time to take care of yourself, that shouldn’t be an issue between you and your boo. Just know, you will need to express it! Just like you can’t read his mind, he can’t read yours either. Let him know that you like to spend Sunday evening prepping meals, to go to bed early during the week to make it to your morning workouts, and like to set aside a few nights a month for girls nights. If he’s a keeper, he’ll get it, and he’ll probably be happy to have some time for himself too!

avoiding the girlfriend 15 - so you're committed

2. Cook together.

Rather than order greasy take out or indulge in a night out, cook a healthy meal together for a cute date night! Play some music and divide up the cooking tasks. It saves calories and money and also give you a chance to see how you work as a team. My boyfriend and I love making chicken fajitas, kebabs on the grill, and fish for dinner or frittata, omelettes, protein pancakes, oatmeal, and/or breakfast tacos for brunch.

avoiding the girlfriend 15 - so you're committed

3. His food is not your food.

One of the side effects of becoming someone’s girlfriend – you’re exposed to twice as much food! As you spend more time at his place, you have more opportunity to raid his cabinets. And, if he keeps cookies in his pantry, you’re probably more likely to eat them than him! Am I right? What is it about some men who can keep sugar in the house and forget about it?! I don’t know about you but I keep very close tabs on my chocolate stock.

Do yourself a favor and plan ahead. If you know you’re going to want a snack while you’re on his turf, pack your own! Put some nuts, fresh fruit, chopped veggies and hummus, individual plain Greek, almond, or coconut yogurt, hardboiled eggs, 70% or higher dark chocolate, or an all-natural protein bar in your purse to cure any hunger pains. If you feel comfortable stocking his cabinets, you can leave some healthy items there. Just don’t put it next to his chips, candy, etc. Out of sight, out of mind.

4. Couples fitness challenge.

What’s more fun than going after a goal together?! You may not have the same exact goals, but you can have similar plans and hold each other accountable. Challenge yourself and your partner to exercise a certain number of days, stay away from processed food, sleep at least 7 hours, and drink half your body weight in oz of water per day (or more!). My boyfriend and I love waking up Saturday morning and heading to the gym or a class before we chow down on some healthy brunch. Knowing he’s also in the gym motivates me to work harder. Hey baby, I got muscles too! 😉

avoiding the girlfriend 15 - so you're committed

Give this post a Share, a Like, or a Comment! And tell me in the comment box below, have you ever started a new relationship and found that your healthy routines got derailed? How have you made healthy choices while dating someone new?

Learn how to balance your love life with your fitness goals!

* indicates required



Missed the other Avoiding the “Girlfriend 15” posts? Catch up!

Avoiding the “Girlfriend 15” – So You’re Dating

Avoiding the “Girlfriend 15” – So You’re Comfortable

Health and happiness,
Emily

 

[wdi_feed id=”1″]

Share the love!

Hi and welcome to Life in Spandex! I’m Emily, a personal trainer who believes there should be no secrets standing in your way to getting fit. I am sharing my knowledge here on this blog in order to help you reach your goals. Fitness should be fun, eating healthy should taste good, and feeling your absolute best is the ultimate goal. Let’s get fit together!

15 comments
  1. […] Avoiding the “Girlfriend 15” – So You’re Committed […]

  2. Thank you for sharing at Ravenwould.

  3. After 3 years of being together my boyfriend is finally beginning to let me teach him to cook and enjoy cooking which I’m enjoying. Fitness goals together is such an amazing idea that I want to do so badly but I have a disability which means I can’t excercise so easily but my boyfriend has just joined a gym again and want to try and get fit. I wish I could join him but I can’t, is there any other way I can help him keep motivated. 🙂

  4. My husband and I cook completely separate meals. COMPLETELY. I don’t touch his food and he doesn’t touch mine. We just get each other. hahaha!

    1. Hahaha you guys are adorable … so he’s not a salmon addict too?!

  5. I just found your blog via the linkup and I love this post and your page in general. So true about men keeping tempting foods in their cabinets. I don’t stock ice cream in my fridge because then I will eat it every night but my boyfriend used to buy and keep my favorite ice cream around. Nice gesture but then I started packing on the pounds. Haha.

    1. Thank you so much!!! Haha it’s like “honey that’s sweet, but stop it” lol!

  6. I have the opposite problem with the food, I forget about it. I’m not a big sweet eater, and when I snack I don’t venture far from my single box of Cheeze-Its party mix. My husband on the other hand is a pantry raider, will wait until the still of the night to ravage through the shelf, leaving the kitchen an absolute disaster, and eating all that had been long since forgotten. 😉

    1. Really??!! Haha oh goodness… I can’t believe he leaves evidence!!! 😉

  7. This is such a good post for women of all ages. Too many times women can compromise themselves in a relationship. Or their boyfriends become their hobbies. The advice given here, promotes women to maintain their identities and interests, whilst sharing time with their boyfriends.

    1. Exactly, Jacqueline!!! 🙂

  8. I can honestly second the motion of cooking together. Its one of the things my fiancé and I love doing together. Can’t argue with nice food either. Thanks for sharing.

    1. It’s so fun! I love cooking with him 🙂

Leave a reply!